Off Topic

So, I know this is a bit off topic, but it's on my mind at the moment and I thought this could be a place where we'd struggle together as a group.  We were talking about creating a safe environment to struggle in and I think it could start here.

That being said ... here we go.

I find myself at an impasse.  I want to say that I hate Christians ... however, one of the main reasons I feel that way is due to the hatred displayed by so many Christians.  How am I any different if I hate the hater for their hatred.  I've found myself in the past few days fantasizing about leaving the church all together.  Make no mistake, I'm not talking about leaving or abandoning the faith or my relationship with God/Jesus.  I am talking about just whole heartedly dumping those self-righteous, noncommittal, uncaring, judgmental, and all together unsavory people I've come to know as the Christian "community."

I'm not saying that how I feel is appropriate, I am saying it's how I feel.  I put so much time, energy, and money into a group of people that seem to care nothing for me.  I'm viewed as immature, unworthy, and even potentially dangerous.  I'm tired of fighting for the approval of a group of people who were set out to hate me from the start.

The issue now is this.  How can I say this?  How can I feel this way without being exactly what I hate so much?  How can I turn and do something different without inherently judging the Christian community by such an act?

I saw a bumper sticker yesterday that said "Wage Love."  It broke my heart and made me joyous all at the same time.  That to me is exactly how I want to live my life.  I think more important than attending church, or reading my bible, or even praying, is the ability to "Wage Love" on the people around me.

Lose My Salvation? What are you talking about?!?!

Ok all, this is the first topic of discussion at our little island of misfits blog site as requested by Jen :-).  Tonight we are discussing whether or not you can lose your salvation once you've accepted Jesus Christ as your savior.  I'll take notes tonight and post the discussion so Jen can add in her two cents as well.